Every Three Weeks I Let Cancer Win A Battle

On this day, typically the fifth or sixth since my last chemotherapy infusion, every insecurity and unspoken fear of mine wraps their icy fingers around my wrist and drags me deeper and deeper into the abyss. I can’t fight it. I simply don’t have the strength. My body feels heavy and useless. My antiemetic pills bring me no relief from…

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Love Is All Around Us (Even In My Chemo Unit)

A chemotherapy unit is a funny place to find yourself. It’s almost verging on parody. On one hand you’re surrounded by all these seriously ill people – bald, pale, shrunken forms – a snapshot of cancer at it’s most wicked. It also serves as a stark reminder that a cancer diagnosis unleashes a tsunami of toxicities on the body and…

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Cancer: A Series of Compromises I Don’t Want To Make

My youngest, Jess, starts school on Monday. She’s so excited she might burst. She keeps packing her new book bag with toys and taking her new Clarks shoes out of their box. The build-up to this big event has been carefully micromanaged, often from my bedside. Shoes were bought six weeks ago regardless of the inevitable ‘summer growth spurt’. Her…

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Sorry Tay-Tay, It’s A No-No: Why Taylor Swift’s New Song Is Bad For Victims Of Bullying

Before this week I had a bit of a soft spot for Taylor Swift, even after my children decided to adopt her music as a new form of torture for me. No Prisoner of War should ever have to endure endless out-of-tune renditions of ‘Shake It Off’ at 6am in the morning. I couldn’t help admiring her either. Here was…

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Recipe: Breakfast Berry-Bonanza Smoothie

The worst thing about cancer is the loss of control over your body – that’s pure hell for a control freak like me! One way I’m striking back is through diet and exercise. These are the small things that I DO have a say in… With chemo imminent I’ve adopted a strict veggie diet (plus fresh fish for the good…

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To My Husband This Father’s Day

I met you when I was seventeen. I think I loved you even then. Eleven years later we were married. Two years later I was pregnant with Emily. Two years after that we had Jessica. Our life is full of numbers. The good ones are the birthdays we’ve shared, the wedding anniversaries, all eight of them, and the parenting milestones,…

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Having a Breast Biopsy: My Experience

I feel like I’m on a medical juggernaut at the moment, one that’s driven by that crazy truck driver from the movie, ‘Duel’. It’s careering all over the road and that’s me, over by the back bumper, hanging onto the number plate by my fingernails. That’s the real kicker with The Big C… suddenly your whole body is under scrutiny.…

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