Is it ok to cry in front of your kids?

The kids have DESTROYED me with their tantrums today. It’s like the tag team of doom; as soon as one kicks off, the other feels compelled to scream even louder. I tried shutting myself in the bathroom but the little buggers knew the lock was busted and barged in anyway. Next thing I know we’re all sat on the toilet crying our eyes out.

It doesn’t help that we’re in chaos. The cottage renovations are well underway in both the lounge and kitchen so there’s no escaping the dust. The kids are unsettled and it’s manifesting itself in some pretty bad behaviour. There’s a huge bag of plaster where their toy chest used to be, crap everywhere and I keep screeching at them not the touch the wet cement on the walls.

I remember reading some article last year about how crying in front of your kids can cause psychological damage. If so then my kids are screwed! They’ve been dealing with the fallout of my PND, chronic illness and, on occasion, SAHM-phobia since the day they were born.

The worst thing is I know it scares them shitless to see me cry. Even so, there’s a teeny tiny part of me that hopes it might be a good thing too. I’m normalizing displays of emotions. We’re only human. My tears are saying that it’s ok to be sad, especially when a couple of little rat-bags have driven you up the wall, through the ceiling and over next door’s fence…

In the end, I pulled myself together, gave them both a big hug, reassured them that mummy was fine and that we all needed to cry sometimes, but can you PLEASE stop stealing all your sister’s toys, and then we stuffed our faces with lemon drizzle cake.

Three weeks to go with the renovations. I think I’m going to have to do some serious baking to get us through this one…

Wish me luck!

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13 Comments

  1. March 1, 2017 / 3:23 pm

    I don’t have kids but I can imagine it’s hard at times. I cry at most things ! #bestandworklinkup xx

  2. March 2, 2017 / 2:08 pm

    Sometimes you just cannot help it, and I do not think it hurts, we are only human and they need to see it, then we can all cuddle and move on.

  3. March 2, 2017 / 2:15 pm

    Ah the wonders of Lemon Drizzle Cake!

    I often ask myself the crying question. I generally try not to cry in front of them because I don’t want them to worry about me, but sometimes it’s inevitable and, like you say, it shows them that it’s okay to cry.

    I think, as parents, we need to model all kinds of behaviour and just be aware that our kids are watching. When we argue, do we play fairly or are we nasty to the other person? When we’re upset, how do we manage that emotion and what do we do to help ourselves? When we’re excited how do we show that without being silly? Our kids are learning from us all the time (and yes that is a lot of pressure and rather terrifying!) so we need to be mindful and do our best to demonstrate how to deal with different emotions effectively.

    But in conclusion (sorry for the rambly post!) I think it’s okay to cry in front of your kids #brillblogposts

    • March 2, 2017 / 9:04 pm

      I agree with all of that, Lucy. And yes, lemon drizzle does work wonders in times of crisis 🙂

  4. thesingleswan
    March 2, 2017 / 5:41 pm

    We are all human and children have to understand the full range of human emotions. I think it is both perfectly normal and perfectly good for your children to see you cry on occasion. Good luck with the renovations. Pen x #brillblogpists

  5. March 3, 2017 / 10:53 am

    Yes I absolutely agree that it is ok. Children need to see emotion good and bad, and I think so long as you explain why you are crying to them it’s absolutely fine. I have cried in front of my daughter both in happiness and sadness many a time! Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub xoxo

    • March 3, 2017 / 11:14 am

      Glad to hear it’s not just me! Thanks for commenting xx

  6. March 7, 2017 / 2:46 am

    It freaks me out when my parents cry. I’m sure it freaks my kids out. There have only been a few times when I’ve done it and it was along time ago.

    I love this post and am going to share it with both my Facebook pages: Facebook.com/iamzoewatson and facebook.com/mommysmidlifequest

    brillblogposts

  7. March 13, 2017 / 9:02 pm

    Oh bless you! I think it is fine to cry in front of your kids, you’re human of course. Thanks for linking up #bestandworst

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